After a long day of work fixing software issues and reading all my spam email I finally go home looking for some peace and quite. I am sure I am not different than any other dad. All I want is a hour or two of peace and quite. Usually I don’t get what I want. The 2 month old baby is now tired and cranky. My wife is tired of the tired baby. She also had a long day with no one to talk to.

Just image, a wife who says several thousand words per hour but has no one to talk to. All those words bundled up inside ready to explode out when I get home. Just image, a guy who’s brain is big enough to hold about 100 words a day and the brain is filled before the first coffee break. Now put those two people together at about 4:30pm.

This is about the time when disaster can hit. Nothing is worse than putting to tired people together who want opposite things then throwing a baby into the mix. It has only been about two month and I can see the frustration that parents face. As a child it is impossible to understand why your parents would ever fight (not that my parents ever fought much) but now faced with stressful days, sleepless nights and no time to let your brain rest, arguments are much more likely to occur.

So what should we do to stay sane? How do we get our peace? Now is the time when most care is needed to keep things from getting out of hand. The only way to get through is with lots of work, self-sacrifice and patience.

First thing that we need to realizes is that we must understand where the other person is coming from. No matter how hard it is for me to come home to a crying baby or to listen to stories about poopy diapers, my wife needs to talk. She knows I need at least a few minutes of rest because we talked about it. Just as much as I need some silence, she needs to talk. Dinner is not a good time as we eat on shifts while walking the baby. So there needs to be a solution.

Most of my day is spent sitting. I get very little exercise. Most of my physical activity consists of walking to the coffee machine, pushing either the mocha or coffee button, walking back to the desk and then about 30 bicep curls with the coffee mug in hand. So we came up with a solution that will let my wife talk and keep me from becoming an overweight office guy.

For us one of our best times is our evening walk through the park. We have about a five minute drive and then spend about 45 minutes walking. During this time the baby is usually quite and we can spend some time talking together. For us that is our best quality time. It is a habit we have formed and do almost daily. I like the walk, she likes the talk.

Through the midst of all the changes in our lives we can not forget the needs of our spouse. It is import that we keep our relationships our highest priority. We all will have our own solutions. What is yours? Send me your comments about what is you do with your wife to relax and spend quality time together.